Today I began with a hope and filled with peace. I prayed that the day would be filled with laughter, joy and patience.
I have a lot of assignments I have to do in school as well as for my team and for my life after this trip which can be quite overwhelming. I have to write a draft of an essay, submit it, then revise it again. I have to start another essay which will be my last for the class. Then I have to take two tests for my other classes after I study for them. That is just my school assignments. I get three hours a day to focus on school, however, I also have other responsibilities that make the three hours seem closer to an hour and a half. I have been so busy that my anxiety makes me lose focus. I start my day with reflecting on Gods grace for me in the hard times and rejoice at his goodness.
I am so thankful to have a drive that pushes me through even when uncomfortable and I still ask to be more driven and hungry. I have to remind myself that the Lord is my rock and foundation. He is the stable thing in my life when everything else seems up in the air.
I start my day hoping for the best, but I fail. Throughout the day I frustrate myself for not meeting my own expectations of myself. I ended the day with questions, worry, and stress. My life feels like a game you play on your phone. You tap the screen as the camera distorts your face and try to put your face back together. The game is meant to be stress-inducing so that you mess up. In life I find myself attempting to reconstruct my face every morning, but fail to keep it the same throughout the day. I am learning how to surrender my expectations to the Lord in this area. There I blogged Charis!
