2|22|2024
This blog is just an excerpt of my journal on Sunday and it gives you just a little glimpse into what I’ve been experiencing lately!
So, this past week has been really good and I’m actually really gonna miss it here in South Africa. I’ve built so many relationships, felt so loved, and God’s creation here is simply stunning, and that’s the understatement of the year. The beautiful sunsets here remind me so much of God’s faithfulness, how though we might change and look different every day, He remains the same. Somedays might look a bit cloudier than others, but it makes us appreciate even more the days that are not!
I’ve been doing well, but the Lord has really been testing my faith deeply, and I didn’t even realize the significance of it until about an hour ago.
This week I’ve just been thinking about things back home and what God has in store for my future, being in the moment but also realizing that I need to make some decisions and just not having clarity or peace about it. On Thursday, we had a Beauty for Ashes event for the women on our squad which was just so wonderful and the Lord spoke in great ways! In the event we all wrote prophetic love letters from God to someone (we didn’t know who). When I received mine, it was from my wonderful teammate, Megan, and it said dear random person (random person, my foot). Little did she know who God would have it go to. It really spoke deeply to me, but also sounded almost like a broken record. It said faithfulness in big letters on the front and talked about remaining faithful to Him even if we don’t see the point right now. That’s about all I’ve been hearing from the Lord right now, but it was so timely.
The next day, Friday, I flew to Johannesburg for a rugby game and did not feel myself the whole weekend. I just really felt the enemy trying to get in my head through dreams and different temptations that I don’t normally face, and I really felt physically weak, which is not normal for me. I had a really good time, but it just felt like the enemy was trying to get the best of me, and not believe what the Lord has already spoken over me so many times. I spent so much time in the Word which was sweet, I just felt so tested.
I didn’t really realize this until I got on the plane back to Port Elizabeth, and I immediately felt lighter. My eyes were opened, and I was immediately able to feel joy and peace like I hadn’t this weekend. I felt so much better physically, mentally, and spiritually!
I got back, and some of the girls were going to McDonald’s. I thought, I don’t really want to go. The Lord said, you should go. I said, okay. I go, I get my McFlurry, and as I’m ordering I think, Lord you are so good, and thank you so much for carrying me through every thing in my life, the good and the bad. I know that you will keep your promises, and I will do my best to remain faithful. I felt so much better, but I still knew deep down that I still didn’t have clarity about my future. But that was okay, because I was at peace with God.
Not even half a minute later, one of the employees starts asking me about what I’m doing here and how cheap iPhones are in America. I proceed to tell them that nothing in America is cheap, and somehow I end up with the majority of the ladies that work there asking me about my faith. Wow.
Some of them were laughing and didn’t really think my faith had been through the fire and proceeded to walk away. But one lady kept persisting, and I found out she was a believer. That’s pretty awesome. We talk about our faith, and I ask if I can pray for her about anything going on in her life. She says, can you pray right here and now? I said, absolutely and pray for her while all the ladies are watching us, whispering and giggling. It was a beautiful moment and I said we would definitely see each other again before I leave J-Bay! Please be praying for all the workers there, that they would truly taste the goodness of the Lord!
I walk away with my ice cream, almost in tears and remember the story about the ninety-nine sheep and the shepherd pursuing the one. It only takes one, and the Lord showed me how it only takes one moment, and gave me some clarity about decisions so I’m able to walk into this week of ministry refreshed and resting in His faithfulness once again!
