We went into this revival night feeling exhausted, drained, and wanting to just go to bed, but we came out feeling energized, excited, and hopeful!!
Normally, the worship team is up on the stage, facing us, but this time they had 2 people standing on the ground, facing the stage, while the other 2 were on the stage like normal.
Before we started worshipping, Julia, the worship leader, drew our attention to the tambourine and bundle of fabric resting on stools on either side of her. “If you feel led, I want you to grab this tambourine and start making music! Or grab the worship flag and start dancing! We want to worship how God is calling us to!”
Immediately, God started telling me He wanted me to jump and dance and sing my heart out. I told Him, “No, this isn’t an energetic song. I’m not going to jump and dance. I don’t even know how to dance! I’ll just sing.”
God wouldn’t let it rest, but I was determined to ignore Him, at least until someone else started doing it first. For the first 30 minutes or so, I felt so torn. I wanted to do what God was telling me to, but for some reason I had a problem with what He said. I wanted to flap my hands and jump like a little kid receiving a surprise, but I was far too self conscience to do that.
I eventually sank to the floor, legs crossed, hands folded, head bowed, desperate to be freed from this terrible feeling. A feeling of being so afraid of what the world would think of me worshipping my King. It didn’t matter that the people I was surrounded by wouldn’t care if I screamed at the top of my lungs. All I could think of was why I shouldn’t do it, while all I wanted was to do it! I knew it was the enemy making me think this way, but it felt so much harder than usual trying to get him out of my head.
After trying to fight with God over it, and having Him gently remind me of truth and pour His peace over me in response, I stood to my feet again, surrendered to whatever He wanted me to do.
I felt so much lighter, and when the song picked up, I started bouncing on my feet, then jumping! And I wasn’t alone! Other girls on my Squad were doing the same thing. Even though we all had exhausted muscles and blisters on our feet (remember, this was the same day as the hike down the mountain), we jumped for as long as we could, then jumped even longer!
The song continued to grow, and more and more people joined in! We grasped hands and spun! We sang as loud as we could! We prayed healing and shouted for joy, even when there was nothing exciting! And we abandoned our fear of man in favor of cheering for our Father with everything we had in us!
We worshipped for 3 hours…
3 hours!
And it only felt like 30 minutes!
Following what God tells us to do is so much better than doing things our own way! Our earthen vessels might not agree, but our spirits soar when we do! You might not always have as good of an experience as you want, but it brings you closer to God, and isn’t that all we really long for?
