“God, how do I have faith? How do I trust you when I am not in the circumstances I want to be in?”
“Remember who I am and what I’ve done.”
It’s easy to have faith when your circumstances are just right. When you know what is coming next. When the enemy is quiet. When you don’t have anxiety about everything in the world. When you have enough funds in your bank account to get you through the end of the month. When you know where you are going to lay your head next month. When you are rested enough to do your job and do it well. When the circumstances are right, faith is easy.
It’s not so easy to have faith when you don’t know what’s next, you don’t have funds to get you through the end of the month, and the enemy is so loud you can’t hear yourself think. Faith is hard when your mind, body, and spirit are exhausted and you don’t have the strength to keep going. Faith is hard when you know your only hope is Jesus, but for some reason that doesn’t feel like enough right now. These are my circumstances right now. Faith is hard when your circumstances are not what you want them to be.
I found myself crying to the Lord in our secret place with my back turned to Him, asking Him how to have faith in what feels like a hopeless situation. His response was simple “remember who I am and what I’ve done.”
I can look back on every trial of my life and see the hand of God over it. I can see where His devine will brought life and endurance to a seemingly dead and weak circumstance.
Lord, I remember when I had no purpose in my life and on July 12th 2020 at 2:20am You said I would go into your nations and share the hope of Christ with the very people you saw when you died on the cross, and today I stand in Your nations sharing the truth.
Lord, I remember when You said your parents will know who I am, and now they do.
Lord, I remember when I felt so much guilt and shame and You said “my blood is sufficient and you are clean.”
Lord, I remember when I cried out to you scrambling to find a job feeling behind and like a failure, and you said “be still and know that I am God.”
Lord, I remember when I was dead in my trespasses and sin, but You, being rich in mercy because of the love in which you love me, even while I was dead in my transgressions made me alive in Christ.
Lord, I remember when you said “I am who I am.”
Lord, I remember that you are the Alpha and the Omega. The rock on which I stand. The quiet voice the leads me to green pastures and quiet waters. You are my refuge. You are the protector and the comforter. You are my Lord and Savior and with you all things are possible. Lord, you are all of these even when it is hard for me to believe it. Even when I have to remember who you are and what you have done so I can believe it.
May all of the glory, honor, and blessings go to the One who is worthy of it all.
